DG89

I want to sing

admin — Wed, 16 Apr 2025 22:11:07 +0000

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

I want to sing, my throat is hoarse, I want to love, but love is lost.

I gave enough, I gave the most, and went from fine to only worse.

I knocked so long, but door was closed, I tried and waited through remorse.

I hoped and prayed, ignored the cost, ignored the silence and the frost.

Perhaps, the sun will never shine, when locked in fear, pain, and guilt.

Perhaps, the fault was never mine, but how audience was built.

I didn’t fail to revive the wonders floating in the sky.

I lived my days, I lived my life, and thought that evil was a lie.

And thus, I failed to protect. I’d just ignore, avoid, defect

The very evil in a sin. I tried to prove that love would win.

But pain and fear ran amok, I fought it off for just too long.

Instead of love, I just prolonged the torment of illusive past.

I couldn’t save the world from hate, I couldn’t balance left and right.

I didn’t need to simply wait. It wasn’t peace. It was a fight.

It felt familiar, felt like love, but I confused past love and pain.

I floated freely from above, and fell below, like summer rain.

I’m angry, hurt, confused, and sad, but maybe it already passed.

What I have had, the good, the bad… it doesn’t have to live and last.

I’ll rise again, and looking back will feel like any other day.

I’ll love, I’ll float, I’ll sing again. I won’t give up. This is my way.

Dmitriy

Author

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

Always trying

admin — Tue, 18 Mar 2025 21:00:23 +0000

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

Always trying to defy, to explain, to justify,

Scratch an itch I never had, hence relief shall not arrive.

Live through shadows of a dream, one I never really had,

Clipping own helpless wings, let’s not call it good or bad.

Running fast, but what’s the point? Can’t escape where you belong.

Pushing boundaries, testing borders, what I fear, I prolong.

Uninvited interaction, opened doors to empty fields,

They determine my reactions, justifying mental shields.

Walk along a narrow path, praying to forgotten wrath.

Making sense of convoluted math of others’ pitied faith.

I don’t stand for death and horror, even for a licit cause.

I don’t like what I have witnessed, I excuse the love, of course.

Pain and pleasure, bold or scary, yes, the opposites attract.

Yet repulsed and empty chaos isn’t how to react.

Yes, I’m damaged, and repair, while envisioned, often slips.

Tolerating my survival brings the pain of endless whips.

I’m not quitting, never settle, don’t accept the ruthless truth.

I have switched to endless struggle from some vodka and vermouth.

Dmitriy

Author

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

Little Girl

admin — Wed, 05 Mar 2025 20:33:54 +0000

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

Little girl, you are in a whirl, building walls, confusing goals.

Little girl, in bed you curl, teary pearl, like paying toll.

Won’t be long till you feel wrong, pain extended and prolonged.

Gliding through your life’s song, stand among, like King of Kong.

Little girl, you’re not so little, can’t be lost, or weak, or brittle,

Feels like boomerang to fetal form, and mind is un-reformed.

Uninvolved and scrupulated, haven’t popped, and yet elated,

Dated, rather unrelated. Stated thoughts and now hated.

Re-examined. Comprehended, that it’s time to simply end it.

Blended thoughts were born, and truth hurts, like an infected tooth.

Ruthless concepts and ideas switched to vaya, con, and dios.

Yes, it’s time to just move on. Doesn’t mean that you condone

Worlds emerged from others’ deeds, but it’s better than misfits running round,

So unwound, and demand your duty-bound dedication to a cause.

I’ve regressed again, of course.

Back to changes implemented. When you did it, yes, you meant it.

In that moment, feelings rented to your anger.

Longer, fun, as if a banger, resonating like a ringer.

You’re not only simply mad due to being disregarded.

Feelings warded, gestures guarded. To your life you’re slightly tarded.

Is it time to just announce to the world you’re like a mouse?

In your own you’re a giant, incomplete, but still defiant,

Self-reliant, uncompliant, nimble, simple, like a lion.

When you stumble, you slow down, lose your ground, lost and found.

Yet, your future undetermined, while you go round and round.

Maybe time to just rewind and embrace the constant grind.

Maybe time to live a little, happiness can be so brittle.

Maybe time to look within, life can only be so mean.

And embrace the hate and love. Wait. I think I wrote enough.

Dmitriy

Author

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

When I was little, weak, and ill

admin — Tue, 17 Dec 2024 14:57:15 +0000

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

When I was little, weak, and ill and mom not telling what’s
the deal.

She gave me hugs, and love, and still, she built my mind,
resolve, and will.

Yet, I am muzzled by piecemeal approach to life. And I
distill

Whatever memories remain, use them sporadically for pain.

Life gives me boost, but it’s a drain, there was a time when
I was vain,

When shallow thoughts provide allure, but list of obstacles,
it grew.

Yet, life and I are never through, we please each other all
the time.

To love, to feel, you need no dime, you only need the will
to live,

To breath, create, and to abate, to calm and chill, be less
irate,

To kiss and dream, love on a whim, and lights they dim, but
on a stage.

I’m burning sage, and don’t engage, ignore the boundaries of
cage,

But my periphery is great, and future memories await,

It is my fate to never hate, my personality, my trait.

I must go in, I must create, but I’ve been slacking as of
late.

At any rate, in any case, my life is mine, I shall embrace.

Dmitriy

Author

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

My thought becomes my greatest claim

admin — Sun, 15 Dec 2024 20:24:42 +0000

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

You made me feel, I was surprised, I took a chance to no demise,

I told the truth and skipped the lies, but please don’t say it wasn’t wise.

I can be mean, I can be nice, but always true, I roll the dice.

Afraid of little, cut the ties, I act myself with no disguise.

I’m always curious, of course, and if you’re not, you’re getting tossed.

And when it’s bad, it could be worse, and when it’s good, I stay the course.

I live in spite of all the loss, I feel because of my remorse,

I open windows and doors to everything, except the choirs.

It’s mine to make, it is my choice, my greatest power is my voice.

Stick to myself, don’t hang with boys, your heart and mind become my toys,

I walk on roads, like driving Royce, enjoying Em’, 5’9 da Royce.

And do I really need a friend, while life is always on the mend?

I build myself, it is my brand, it is a choice and not a trend,

I’d rather be on open sand, and waves will wash my feet, my hands.

They wash my sorrow and my pain, it hides my tears, like the rain,

There’s no demise, but some disdain, and thought becomes my greatest claim.

Dmitriy

Author

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

Beach

admin — Sun, 07 Jul 2024 16:22:26 +0000

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

Lights are flashing in a pool, the resort is showing off.

I’m forever just a tool for the ocean and it’s love.

I’m forever just a stranger on a passage on a beach,

Nevermind the wavy danger, I did not arrive to teach.

I have landed in Cancun to deep in in a lagoon.

Landed in Montego Bay, on the sand I got to lay.

And Aruba, Santa Lucia played the role of mental cushion.

Sunny fusion, total freedom, wrote the words and now read them.

Don’t forget to end and weep, stop your speeches, bite the lip.

Words are just unnecessary, they are making things so dreary.

Just the ocean and the beach, sun is shining and don’t preach.

Let it go and give in, and let go of the grin.

Punta Cana, La Romana, Haifa sun, and Tel Aviv,

Ate some mangoes and bananas, on a beach I saw a film.

Chased the seagulls, iguanas, and escaped a rattlesnake,

Rode the camels, petted llamas, craved the water, since I waked.

Santorini and Mykonos, all the way to South Beach,

Sunny Isles to Redondo, but I missed the Georgia peach.

Ocean washing off my feet, I don’t have a single care,

I sometimes forget to eat, on a beach I’m laying bare.

Need a moment not so long, let it happen all the time.

Life without beach is wrong, almost like committing crime.

Dmitriy

Author

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

We are the same

admin — Mon, 24 Jun 2024 13:36:52 +0000

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

We are the same. In day and night. In fortune, misery, alike.

Forever right and always wrong, it’s all the same, our living song.

We are the same. We try to change. We claim to open novel doors.

Consistency of our plight is overshadowed by our deeds.

How unpredictable and strange we start and finish our wars.

And outcome from our intent, emotions’ bouncy proceeds.

We twist and turn in our mind, we seek to fill more empty space,

We rest our heads on our goals, but truth be told, we’re in a daze.

There was a time when we explored. We now climb to our demise.

We’re never boring, never bored. If we despise, it’s only lies.

Our eyes are open. Hearts, like ice. Our actions smooth and calculated.

However weak, or maybe strong, we always sing our own song,

And walk along, but still alone, and our uniqueness overrated.

We hurt, we crave, we fear, and try, and our stories variate,

But our judgments, some exposed and others hidden, just a bait.

For our differences vain, and our opinions subjugated.

Our dreams and goals are rather small, but still, they make us feel elated.

We are the same. We bicker, still. We argue over petty things.

The biggest wars, the greatest tensions obscure resolve, destroy intentions,

And cause not victories, but grief. And yet somehow we believe that battle is the only way.

It’s not about what we say, it’s our conviction in ourselves preventing us from seeing clearly.

And disregarding every sense, we go back to feeling tense.

Dmitriy

Author

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

I often wonder sitting still

admin — Mon, 29 Jan 2024 04:18:39 +0000

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

I often wonder sitting still of what is my – no need to steal, of what is life beyond the reel,

When life, it happens on the real, of share of Pavlov in my will, it’s hard to live and hard to kill,

Of what life brought and forced to leave, and gifting guilt, and loss, and grief,

And elevation of belief, when you abandoned lonely cliff, and fly beneath, however brief,

Misunderstanding your motif, you might as well just go and leave,

Transverse from random, bright, and brief, to be the champion, the gift,

To steal a purpose, like a thief, to be the change, the mental shift,

To give a hand and to uplift, be in the know, catch the drift,

Be on the go, travel bug, but where you go is the rub.

I’d rather drop the illest rhyme, than be a power pantomime,

Marionette lives on a dime, but in the head it’s not the same.

I go through days, however lame, without drama, pain, and shame,

So, why or why it’s so insane, as if I’m living through migraine of everyone around me.

And I put up a fair screen, but seldom going for the win.

Win comes around, it belongs, my essence begs and pants and groans

My days are painted in red, and blue, and purple, and vignette,

And true and simple is the end, but till you die, just pay the rent

On days in which you operate, when you’ve been chosen, paid, and laid,

With whom you laid, or how great life felt that moment, and you said:

The moment, please, don’t ever end, don’t ever cease, you’re such a tease,

I love myself in every piece of every action and intent.

I love to vent, and cause consent, I take what’s given, nothing more.

Forevermore, it ain’t no more, I shudder to my very core,

I hate the war, adore the lore, and always, always ask for more.

The mind I tore from door to door, and when a loser, never sore.

I sleep and rest, but not enough, I live so well and yet, so rough.

I wrap my tude with nervous laugh, and wrap my rhyme, like it’s enough.

But words are pouring, can’t be stopped, but thoughts are racing, and erupt.

The thought of losing never popped, the hope for better never stopped,

So here I sit, my dreams are chopped, but vibrant in rainbow light.

I know I’m right, and I just might, be right enough to always laugh,

To always shine, while drinking wine, and cheese and grapes, and crepes and dates,

I’m losing count of the days, and of my thought, so I just thought that I already said a lot. Arrivederci on the dot.

Dmitriy

Author

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

What’s the point of a point?

admin — Sat, 16 Dec 2023 00:32:24 +0000

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

What’s the point of a point? Any point, any joint, all deliberate
intent, never broken, always bent.

What is up with up and down, fix the frown, be a clown, life
has rainbows and light, have a taste, it is your right.

Have a look, go look and see, go ahead and cross the sea, go
get it, don’t pass up, from now on it’s always up.

It’s a reading, not a rap, speak the truth, don’t set a trap,
my mischievous intonations brought excitement and sensations.

Here I am. My name is I. I would never even lie. Why would I,
and why would you get the lesser, be denied?

Why the strangest expectations, causing extra indignation, ‘catch-your
breath’ exasperation, transformations to the new? One you always kinda knew. Hence
you never start anew.

It’s ok, you’ll get it right. Almost certain that you might.
I don’t really wanna fight, so my lip I better bite.

Wish you luck in your attempts to redo what mind prevents. Even
tends to misdirect, challenging your intellect.

Messing with your night and day, even getting in the way of
the way you always are, maybe shy, but still a star.

Sticking like the summer tar, claiming peace is so bizarre, replicating
Myanmar, your ambition’s Renoir.

Your preset determination, makes for blanket indentation, back
to bare exasperation, to the empty augmentation,

Stage the semi-cancellation of whatever’s on your mind,
cause it messes with your might, so it feels like something died.

So, it hounds steadi-ly , and it never really leaves, keeps
on coming, no relief, so you tend to just relive everything that you have
lived.

All at once. And it appears that your stature disappears, fighting
tears, consequences.

Putting up some brand-new fences. Craving glances – they don’t
look. Flipping pages of a book.

Maybe so, that it took, more of you then you could give, so it’s
harder to forgive. Might as well just breathe and live,

No incentive to deceive, disengage, or misconceive, get
caught up in some pet peeve, always edgy, no relief.

Dmitriy

Author

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

I walked the streets with pompous feel

admin — Sat, 12 Aug 2023 20:36:04 +0000

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg

I walked the streets with pompous feel and I was happy on the reel.

And reel was I, and that’s no lie, and it’s my only alibi,

As we are never satisfied, I aim to please, that’s how I learn. That’s how every story’s born,

That’s how dream becomes your path, it’s extra crispy for empaths, the driven wrath of being right.

Denied the option, that it does to make a point on the pass.

And there are always other ways. Sometimes you see that crime, it pays.

Sometimes you bask in mid-day rays.

Sometimes you’re losing track of days, or maybe it’s a paraphrase.

Or maybe it’s a state of mind, or everything is just sideways.

Time doesn’t heal. Amnesia does. And do you keep all that you kill?

Despite your judgement, brains, and will, you’re lost among the good and ill.

Attempt to chill, but setting bombs, remember when you were on reel and everything was per your will?

Nobody asking ‘what’s the deal? ‘ Just being you, king of the hill. Chameleon on summer break.

Just keep it up, and never break. You only reap all that you made. And that you make, just as of late, you tend to follow a new rate, as if it’s chosen as your fate.

You are the life you want to lead. With every breath and every bid, with every deed and every creed, with every torn tumbleweed,

With every smile, as agreed, abstaining from the ones in need, but choosing who’s enslaved or freed, and when it’s time to drink some mead.

And when the go light is lit.

And you are caught in your own shit.

Dmitriy

Author

https://dg89.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/large.jpg